UK police getting tough in their new LGBTQ-friendly body armour
A minor dip in oestrogen levels in the UK has led to slightly more intense disturbances in some Northern towns. Thankfully, for Britain's underfunded Labour government, the soft Southern part of the country remains heavily oestrogenised.
However, North of Watford there has been what social scientists term "a bit of bother," with some streets in Liverpool and other cities getting as untidy as during a bin strike and people getting shouty in the streets.
More seriously, a Shoezone in Hull and a police office in Sunderland were set on fire, and some bobbies were hospitalised after being bombarded with minor insults and unkind looks from the general public for several minutes.
More seriously, a Shoezone in Hull and a police office in Sunderland were set on fire, and some bobbies were hospitalised after being bombarded with minor insults and unkind looks from the general public for several minutes.
Government ministers remain deeply concerned about the unexplained oestrogen drop, but experts have reassured them that levels will quickly return to normal once the football season starts, and Northerners resume their normal behaviour of passively sucking on pints while watching their favourite Blacks and foreigners kicking balls around.
The 2024/25 Premier League season is expected to kick off on Friday, the 16th of August, but the government could also use emergency powers to bring it forward a few days.
The 2024/25 Premier League season is expected to kick off on Friday, the 16th of August, but the government could also use emergency powers to bring it forward a few days.
British Northerners suffering from temporary oestrogen dip and a lack of footie
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