H1B: ONCE BITTEN, TWICE SHY

The "reasonable arguments" always come with horrendously abused loopholes

by Dr Insensitive Jerk

Here is how the immigration conversation is going:

Smart Guy: The top 0.01% of engineers are incredibly valuable, so we should let them in.

Troglodytes: No! We don't need more Indian convenience store clerks!

Smart Guy: Of course; I get that. We have enough Indian convenience store clerks. I'm just talking about the top 0.01% of engineers.

Troglodytes: Close the border! No more clerks!

Smart Guy: Why can't you understand I am agreeing with you? Look, assuming we had a system that would let in only the top 0.01% of engineers, wouldn't you support it?

Troglodytes: [Waving pitchforks] No more Indian clerks!

Smart Guy: Are you retarded?

The problem is, the troglodytes remember Reagan's amnesty deal. Here is how that went:

Nice Guy: Some Mexicans have been here for 20 years. It would be cruel to kick them out.

Troglodytes: Tough.

Nice Guy: How about we give amnesty to Mexicans who have been here for 10 years, and in return, we will implement E-verify to prevent employers from hiring illegals?

Troglodytes: Oh, alright.

Here is the deal we agreed to: One-time amnesty for long-term residents, in return for permanent E-verify to discourage future illegal immigration.

Here is what we got: E-verify lasted 15 minutes, and 5 years later, every Mexican who crossed the Rio Grande yesterday was still getting instant amnesty, because the "You must prove long-term residence" was not enforced. They turned California, the state that elected Nixon and Reagan, hard blue.

The choice is not between zero immigration and 0.01% of the top engineers; Our choice is between a wall, and a wall with a hole.

Because we know once we allow an exception for the top 0.01%, it will be used to usher in another 5 million convenience store clerks.

So, the troglodytes won't grant the smart guy's premise, not because they are stupid, but because they are smart.

Here is how to solve this problem:

The law that grants a loophole for the top 0.01% engineers must also include the death penalty for anyone who cheats, including congressmen. And it must include a $1M bounty for anyone who reports a cheater.

Then we can talk.

Originally posted as a Twitter thread. Republished here with some minor edits.

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