In the past several years, I’ve come to distance myself from the political right. I realised sometime in 2022 that by marrying white identity politics to the political right, we not only limit our ability to convert liberals and leftists to racialist thinking, but also that we’re opening the tent up to some quite unsavoury characters, many of whom turn out to be non-whites using right-wing ideology to whitewash themselves and pass themselves off as "upstanding members of the white race." As such, I’ve called on white identitarians to dump the right-wing ballast from their ideology.
However, I didn’t really grow disgusted with the political right, or its adherents until relatively recently. Now, it was a long time coming, and it had many reasons. The low quality of human capital on the political right, the hypocrisy, the stupidity, the absence of dynamic thinking, the parochialism, the lack of any aesthetic, culinary, fashion or indeed behavioural standards. But the straw that broke the camel’s back was coal-rolling, or rolling coal.
While I am European, I always thought of myself as well acquainted with American culture and mores. Imagine my surprise when I heard of coal rolling for the first time. For those that don’t know, it’s the practice of installing an after-market modification that if switched on, temporarily disables the fuel filter on a pickup truck, causing the vehicle to belch out billows of black smoke out of its exhaust. The driver then uses this smoke to smother cyclists, pedestrians or drivers of smaller vehicles, impairing their vision and exposing them to noxious fumes.
Drivers of pickup trucks extol coal rolling as a means of "triggering the libs" in real life. While Wikipedia frames it as "protest against environmentalism," I’ve spent enough time in right-wing chats to know that the real reason is just petty cruelty, a character flaw all too abundant amongst right-wingers. And indeed, there are precious few practices in this world which are better described as petty cruelty than coal rolling. After all, these after-market modifications on the already expensive pickup trucks are not cheap, and they have no use other than to annoy and possibly endanger pedestrians, cyclists and other motorists. It requires a creature of remarkable pettiness and revoltingly low moral standards to even consider such an act, yet it is widespread among conservative pickup truck owners.
It’s not like the practice is harmless. Obstructing a driver’s or cyclist’s vision can easily lead to a traffic collision. Obviously, smothering someone in diesel smoke can cause injury to their eyes and respiratory organs. The practice is usually employed against the operators of hybrid cars or cyclists, which is supposed to express contempt for their environmental consciousness. I suppose it’s a variant on that old anti-vegetarian chestnut, "for every animal you don’t eat, I’ll eat two," only this time it’s supposed to mock and frustrate people who care about the environment.
After all, real men dump untreated chemical waste into the seas and blight the common biome, just like those "hypermasculine" Chinese!
The astute observer will also notice that the act of rolling coal is also a means of symbolically farting on a perceived political enemy. Far from a frustrated Frenchman "farting in your general direction," coal-rollers are very much in your face with their vehicular flatulence. This seems to track with data from behavioural scientists who’ve determined that no right-winger has emotionally matured past the age of twelve since at least 1981. I suppose we should have expected no less from the demographic which suspends plastic bollocks from the rear bumpers of their comically oversized vehicles.
So, to recap, an American conservative will purchase an already overpriced gas-guzzling gender affirming vehicle, and then spend even more money modifying it so it has even lower fuel efficiency, just so he could belch black smoke at people. Even if the smoke weren’t dangerous, the sheer self-pauperising lunacy and incredible pettiness of the act mark such people out as nothing but small creatures motivated by seething, miserable hatred.
I note with a dose of irony that such, generally "white" people have a lot more in common with the polluters, animal abusers and petty criminals of the Third World, who at least have the excuse of poverty. How odd that the petty cruelty you would expect from a donkey driver in Baghdad or a dog farmer in Beijing is also found among white right-wingers.
However, I didn’t really grow disgusted with the political right, or its adherents until relatively recently. Now, it was a long time coming, and it had many reasons. The low quality of human capital on the political right, the hypocrisy, the stupidity, the absence of dynamic thinking, the parochialism, the lack of any aesthetic, culinary, fashion or indeed behavioural standards. But the straw that broke the camel’s back was coal-rolling, or rolling coal.
While I am European, I always thought of myself as well acquainted with American culture and mores. Imagine my surprise when I heard of coal rolling for the first time. For those that don’t know, it’s the practice of installing an after-market modification that if switched on, temporarily disables the fuel filter on a pickup truck, causing the vehicle to belch out billows of black smoke out of its exhaust. The driver then uses this smoke to smother cyclists, pedestrians or drivers of smaller vehicles, impairing their vision and exposing them to noxious fumes.
Drivers of pickup trucks extol coal rolling as a means of "triggering the libs" in real life. While Wikipedia frames it as "protest against environmentalism," I’ve spent enough time in right-wing chats to know that the real reason is just petty cruelty, a character flaw all too abundant amongst right-wingers. And indeed, there are precious few practices in this world which are better described as petty cruelty than coal rolling. After all, these after-market modifications on the already expensive pickup trucks are not cheap, and they have no use other than to annoy and possibly endanger pedestrians, cyclists and other motorists. It requires a creature of remarkable pettiness and revoltingly low moral standards to even consider such an act, yet it is widespread among conservative pickup truck owners.
It’s not like the practice is harmless. Obstructing a driver’s or cyclist’s vision can easily lead to a traffic collision. Obviously, smothering someone in diesel smoke can cause injury to their eyes and respiratory organs. The practice is usually employed against the operators of hybrid cars or cyclists, which is supposed to express contempt for their environmental consciousness. I suppose it’s a variant on that old anti-vegetarian chestnut, "for every animal you don’t eat, I’ll eat two," only this time it’s supposed to mock and frustrate people who care about the environment.
After all, real men dump untreated chemical waste into the seas and blight the common biome, just like those "hypermasculine" Chinese!
Tai chi in the smog
The astute observer will also notice that the act of rolling coal is also a means of symbolically farting on a perceived political enemy. Far from a frustrated Frenchman "farting in your general direction," coal-rollers are very much in your face with their vehicular flatulence. This seems to track with data from behavioural scientists who’ve determined that no right-winger has emotionally matured past the age of twelve since at least 1981. I suppose we should have expected no less from the demographic which suspends plastic bollocks from the rear bumpers of their comically oversized vehicles.
So, to recap, an American conservative will purchase an already overpriced gas-guzzling gender affirming vehicle, and then spend even more money modifying it so it has even lower fuel efficiency, just so he could belch black smoke at people. Even if the smoke weren’t dangerous, the sheer self-pauperising lunacy and incredible pettiness of the act mark such people out as nothing but small creatures motivated by seething, miserable hatred.
I note with a dose of irony that such, generally "white" people have a lot more in common with the polluters, animal abusers and petty criminals of the Third World, who at least have the excuse of poverty. How odd that the petty cruelty you would expect from a donkey driver in Baghdad or a dog farmer in Beijing is also found among white right-wingers.
I’ve always known that conservative Americans love their pickup trucks, and that their cultural mores are different from my own. I was ready to accept these differences and celebrate the "great kaleidoscope of Western cultures." However, by embracing the practice of rolling coal, right-wing Americans, and increasingly right-wingers in other countries have shown that they will go out of their way, spend good money and time modifying their vehicles just in order to inflict this, at best, minor inconvenience, at worst, serious injury on others. As such, I can no longer endorse, support or celebrate such people. They’re some of the most morally repugnant creatures I’ve ever had the misfortune to observe, and insofar as their re-education is possible, it cannot begin quickly, or harshly enough.
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