BRITAIN'S YOUTHS TO BE CONSCRIPTED INTO "LABOUR DEATH BATTALIONS" TO BUILD PATHS THROUGH SWAMPS SO THAT BOOMERS CAN FEED THE DUCKS

An artist's impression of how the new policy will look (ducks not shown)

In a move that is certain to see him re-elected, Britain's strongman leader Rishi Sunak has announced a daring new policy that will see Britain's shiftless population of teenagers conscripted into "Labour Death Battalions." They will then be marched out into the countryside at gunpoint, and forced to build "voluntary" paths through Britain's swampy terrain so that their boomer overlords can keep their feet dry when they go to feed the ducks. 

The new policy, which is already a vote winner with viewers of GBNews, is thought to be inspired by Cambodian strong-man Pol Pot, who famously marched millions of the less productive members of his society out into the rice paddies and then worked them to death in the 1970s. Western approval of this act was signalled at the 1984 Academy Awards by awarding the movie celebrating this event, "The Killing Fields," several Oscars, including best cinematography.